I’d ask that you consider this seriously before answering. Not because I think you’ll say no. But because I think you’ll be tempted to say “yes” too quickly.

Think about it. Me, your couch. For 6 hours.

If you’re thinking that perhaps my question isn’t so much about my need to sleep on a couch as it is about something entirely greater, you’re onto something.

Also, the image is not an indicator of my typical behavior. I try not to put my feet on furniture.

This is the first winter I’ve ever gone without setting foot in a single bit of snow. It’s been wonderful. At no point did I feel like I was missing out on something important by not having snow to slip in, shovel around, or drive through.

It just got cold. Not terribly cold. But cold enough that it’s obviously spring now. People are going out on the beaches now. The 5 people in this entire town that get exercise are out jogging around. It’s wonderful.

Spring coughed up warm days like a veteran smoker as clover rushed to heal the scars left by Dad’s overeager snowplow.

I tweeted that earlier. My father was notorious for overeager snowplowing. We made some sweet forts though.

What is your favorite part of spring?

image: source

Remember the game The Oregon Trail?

If you don’t, an explanation won’t help you much. It simply wasn’t a good enough game to be worth explaining.

For those of you who do remember your digital family dying of dysentery, broken axles, and fruitless hunting trips: How would you change The Oregon Trail to fit into the current family of social web-based games?

Would you integrate it with Twitter, like FourSquare but with updates from your game? Would you encourage Facebook’s shifting horde to leave Farmville and join a wagon train of friends travelling west?

I’m interested to know what you’d do!

Image via Wikimedia

Will you take a moment to introduce me to a song you’ve really enjoyed lately? Maura turned me on to Robert Plant and Allison Krauss’s Album Raising Sand.

Polly Come Home is excellent:

Take a music bath once or twice a week for a few seasons. You will find it is to the soul what a water bath is to the body. ~Oliver Wendell Holmes

Let’s fill a tub!

By “enjoy them” I mean I like them enough that I’m not so angry about the train engineer who insists on 3-5 minute horn sonatas as he slows his iron beast to a crawl through town. I’ve also found respite in pretending that he’s using the horn to make some form of social protest. The Narrative has helped more than my imagination though.

Give them a listen.

Get more on their Myspace or find them at SXSW.

As some of you already know, I’ve been spending a lot of my time working on a collection of chapters. It’s big enough to be called a volume but not complete enough to be called a book. In wrestling through a particular portion of the story, I encountered something deep within myself that worried me greatly. Namely, that I was not fully decided on what I thought to be the contents of a full life.

I put that on my list of things to figure out before I die and pressed on to give voice to a particular character’s thoughts on death. The words didn’t come easily. In fact, I’m not sure they’re all in place yet. However, I stumbled across a gorgeous little book written by Adrienne von Speyr called The Mystery Of Death that has proven useful.

Here’s an excerpt from the chapter, Death As A Punishment And An End:

The most compelling consequence of death is not merely separation but a growing limitation of understanding, the breaking off of a dialogue, a rapport, a love which had thought it was wider and bigger. My friend is dead, but this death tears holes in my own existence. Not merely in that my own death comes closer, but more deeply, in that whole context, things I took to be certain and understood are now torn down and taken away.

I love that. Sure, it’s about death and I associate death with a rainbow of pain. But there is also an elegance, a willingness to recognize the crumbling and not despise the crumbles. I hope to provide the same sensibility for my character. Just in shorter sentences. =)

I hadn’t expected to get so much out of this process. A happy surprise. I’m glad for your thoughts.

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I think it captures tones of confidence, morbid whimsy, timely fulfillment, and perhaps even the message that things are serious but not too serious. No? Yes? Jealous because you didn’t think of it first? Idiotic? Sick? A delight?

Let me know what you think!

What constitutes contemplation? First: silent perception of reality. Second: not thinking, but intuition; intuition is knowledge of what is present. Third: knowing accompanied by amazement. Only one who does not see the whole can be amazed.

I added the emphasis to the last portion because it resonates so strongly with me.

So often I am cloaked in this undulating shroud of ungrateful discontent. So often I see a person or set of circumstances and am immediately drawn into an examination of the wrong and lacking in the situation. Why? Because I forget or willfully overlook the fact that I do not see the whole of the matter at hand.

It’s easy to find her annoying until I try to comprehend the greater whole and, realizing I do not see it all, am surprised that she puts up with my behavior and does not find me simple-minded. I can be amazed only after recognizing that there are parts of the situation I do not comprehend.

It’s so comfortable to look at just a few inputs and decide that a project is stupid and not worth my time. But when I step back and try to comprehend the expectations, investments, and disappointments of all involved, I see that my initial declaration of waste was based on an incredibly limited perspective.

Approaching situations with “knowing accompanied by amazement,” that is, my existing knowledge tempered by the understanding that I cannot entirely grasp the whole, is something I’m trying to do more of.

It’s something to think about, to remember, or to possibly forget immediately. The choice is yours.

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That said, I’m still thinking about how I’d like to construct a prenup. Here are my initial thoughts:

• I’ve often heard that you cannot sign a prenup if you are truly marrying for love. I get where that idea comes from but I disagree. I think it’s good to have one’s “final papers” in order before it’s too late. Think of a prenup as you would a clearly marked fire escape in a restaurant. Fewer than 50% of restaurants burn down (clearly outpacing divorce rates) and yet most of use would feel uncomfortable if we didn’t have a way to get out in case of fire.
• Excepting the prenups exhibiting a zenith of eccentricity and compelling partners to vacate the country upon divorce, I see a prenup as a discussion of finances only. (Gosh, that was a terribly-written sentence!) I am a firm believer in discussing finances regularly as part of a healthy relationship. Doesn’t matter if the relationship is business, romantic, or something in between. If there’s money involved, a discussion about said funds will need to take place.

In light of all that, here’s what I’ve come up with as basic terms for my prenup, should I ever need one:

• Full disclosure of personal financial history. “Why did you spend your last $500 on a pair of shoes?” seems like a question best asked when that $500 didn’t represent the dregs of a joint account. I expect to answer a few questions as well. I have good answers for all but one of them.
• There are a lot of smaller details that I’ll refrain from mentioning due to the propensity of some to read big climbs into short hills. =)
• Upon divorce, ownership of all assets, save for a specific sum held in escrow from the day of signing, will be transferred to a charity.

Your thoughts?

image: source

You felt invincible. The snow couldn’t hurt you because you we wearing your trusty snowpants and mittens. Instead of staying inside, you were empowered (or in my case, ordered by your mother) to explore all that the snow had changed in your world.

Then you got older and stopped playing in the snow. There were a few snowball fights in highschool and that one time in college when you streaked across the commons in January. But that’s it. No more building forts or tunneling through snowbanks.

There’s no need for me to worry about you losing your sense of adventure, is there? Surely you’ve replaced tunnelling through snowbanks with exciting projects that just so happen to not require snowpants or mittens? You’ve continued bundling up for adventures and leaping into the unknown with cries of delight. Haven’t you? No?

You must be miserable.

I don’t wear snowpants anymore but I’ve managed to hold onto some of the joyous bravado of my early days. How? It’s pretty simple. That’s right. I’m going to pour you a steaming mug of advice on how you can feel like you’ve got snowpants and mittens on. For free? Yes. For free. Ridiculous!

1. Get two different kinds of nekkid- When dealing with metaphorical snow, it’s often in comfort with exposure that we find the best protection. I recommend having at least one friend who knows the details of something you’re struggling with. Accountability is often a result of such disclosure, but that’s not what we’re concerned with just yet. The key thing here is to have at least one person you’re NOT sleeping with who gets the regular dirt on your life. When it comes to the one you do the naughty and get annoyed over stupid things with, I suggest you stop taking your clothes off and actually get nekkid. If you don’t know what I’m talking about, go ask your mother. (That always worked for my dad as an answer. I figured I’d try it out.)
2. Take baby steps in scary directions- You’ve probably heard the, “do one thing every day that scares you” pitch? That’s resulted in a lot of scary-looking people getting laid but not much else. Most of us aren’t at the point where we can leap at things that terrify us. In fact, it’s often considered a disorder for one to be attracted to risky behavior. Where’s the balance between sleeping with ogres and turning into Miss Havisham? Baby steps. Pick a direction, take a step in that direction, mark your progress, and take another step once you’ve gotten used to the temperature. It’s a lot like getting into a cold pool. Once you’re up to your knees you say, “oh, enough of waiting!” and jump in. I should note that wearing real snowpants won’t do much to protect you if you’re trying to swim in icy water. It’ll probably help you drown, to be Frank.
3. Get some Thinsulation- When you think of insulation, you probably think of either the scratchy pink stuff in your walls or the sort of behavior that plagues most political systems. For just a moment I’d like you to think of insulation as something that protects you and gives a bit of padding for when you leap and don’t land exactly as you’d planned. I want you to think of Kevlar snowpants strong and warm enough that you could slide down a snowy mountain on your butt while wearing them. That’s the sort of insulation you want. The empowering sort of insulation that gives stupidly impossible things a glimmer of plausibility. We’re talking about Thinsulation! How can you arm yourself with such magnificent insulation? By figuring out what really, truly matters to you in life and doing your best to make the rest slip into place as you have time. Not sure what that entails? Start by getting nekkid and taking some baby steps. You’ll find your way soon enough.

Was that as good for you as it was for me? I hope so. Cigarette? No? I don’t smoke either.

What makes you feel invincible?