Somehow, William Butler Yeats was able to see into the future and describe a society grown weak with options:
Turning and turning in the widening gyre
The falcon cannot hear the falconer;
Things fall apart; the centre cannot hold;
Mere anarchy is loosed upon the world,
The blood-dimmed tide is loosed, and everywhere
The ceremony of innocence is drowned;
The best lack all conviction, while the worst
Are full of passionate intensity.
I have just one question for you:
If you developed a physical condition such that you were suddenly unable to use any electronic device, (computer, phone, etc) how many of your internet friends would make a physical effort (write a letter, visit, ask a friend to check on you) to make sure you were alive and well?
I don’t need to know your answer. I’d be grateful if you’d take a few moments to think about it though. There’s another side to the question: how many of your internet friends would you go looking for if they disappeared?
I think there’s a chance we’ve become addicted to familiarity in the mistaken hope that familiarity will lead to understanding. That understanding doesn’t seem to be happening though. Like children, emboldened with the thrill of new relationships, we promise transparency and hope that our risk will be rewarded.
As you float from platform to platform, gobbling up the “new friend smell” that drives so many mad, I hope you’ll remember that relationships are not judged by the quantity of numbers you have in your phone but by the number of people who will answer when you place a call.
Just a thought. I hope your holiday was one of joy and renewal.
Do you want me to check on you? I will, if you want, just give me your phone number.
Will you check on @jef_nance? LOL. I threatened to give him coal if he doesn’t tweet. Nothing. No emails either. Weird. No posts.
Now why did you call this “Social Media’s Second Coming”?
***Jeannie
“The Second Coming” is the title of the poem.
Perhaps.
But I suggest social media merely mimics real life. In our “real” world, we encounter thousands of acquaintances, forge perhaps 250 relationships, and make perhaps 5 real friends. (Or is it just me?). There is a randomness to finding compatibility, sort of like looking for a mate in college — huge numbers of potentials and only a few real fits. Humans turn out to be like jeans, hard to find just the right pair.
So social media is filled with loose connections and odd dead-ends, too. But out of 3,000 or so online nodes, we may find a handful that stick. I’ll take those odds. It’s only by increasing randomness that we find opportunities that lead to real meaning; judging the drivel along the way may miss that point.
BTW, nice Yeats connection.
Hi Ben! I hope your holiday went well.
No, it’s not just you. I think the 5 real friends is probably a lifetime number and a decent one.
You’re making an argument for the dreaded follow-back on Twitter. It’s one you might be able to win, too. I keep “discovering” people only to find that they’d been following me all along. There’s a tradeoff to be had between maximized serendipity and sustainable sanity. I aim to find it.
I’ve definitely thought about this before. Sometimes I think that people rely too much on social media to maintain connections with people. They think that just because they have a Facebook or Twitter account, that counts as being involved in someone’s life.
One of the examples is that of birthdays on Facebook. On someone’s birthday their wall fills up with well wishes. But I wondered what would happen if I took my birthday off – Not one of my Facebook ‘friends’ (including the people I call my best friends) has wished me a happy birthday in 2 years. I think its rather funny. Its almost as if Facebook didn’t tell them, so it doesn’t exist. =P
We have family that would not budge nor make a call.
I have a couple of hundred friends and a coterie have become regulars in terms of internet contact. I think it might be a good idea to expect this medium to produce a new layer or level of communication and not become an invitation list to our next big party. I tend to take it at face value, which I do not do with supposedly real friends or relatives. People can come and go, kind of reminds me of my old bar-hopping days where friendships had about the same level as Facebook.
Hi Seth. I believe in the power of social networks, not just personally but professionally as well. It’s not about numbers. It never has been in my opinion. It’s about connections, helping each other and leveraging tools to provide value of some kind.
I agree with Ben. It’s impossible to keep up with every single person consistently, but there are those few that are solid.
Don’t care about who follows/unfollows, friends/unfriends. The point is that if I care enough about my connections, I will know where to find them. That’s enough for me. Seems to be enough for you as well
Happy New Year!
Anna Barcelos
Seth
Happy New Year to you too.
Do you think it is a great idea it is to have all your photos on the web to share? Well I did too until Google asked me to pay as I bumped over the free limit.
Why not I thought it is so cheap. Then I considered this in the context of your question: “how many of your internet friends would you go looking for if you disappeared?”
Here is my response.
If I die would Google even care as they just drop all my photos in the ether when my auto credit card failed to pay the annual bill.
Also as no one could access my account to get them, given my password dies with me they would be gone forever as would my credit card that was previously paying bill.
So it seems yes there could be a downside. Social network people who have their heads in the clouds may think it feels like a load of good fun, which it is if you dont take it too seriously.
Hm.. I just wonder if they could keep photos that I had added to my free space and only dump ones added to the paid space.
Or would they really care and send my family a condolence card together with a hard disk to bury with me to make space in the clouds for all those who are left.
Maybe that is a question for Santa.
Cheers Gordon
Seth:
Late to the party here, but a pretty provocative thought. But do you really think that anyone considers digital contacts as friends? For every 100 people you find online, perhaps you meet five or 10 of them in person and from those perhaps one or two become people you’d actually have any kind of real relationship with. It could be business or personal or collegial. Another question is whether we really connect with people or just with their soundbites and content. Sort of like how you might chat with someone standing in line at the movies, or sitting close to you at a counter in a restaurant. For a moment you have something in comment, make a human type connection and move on. I have had many “friends” at a given time tied to a particular activity — my golf buddies, my cycling friends, etc. — only to find out afterward that they were people with whom I played golf or cycled. We had something in common but weren’t truly friends. Perhaps in social media it’s the same thing. We have something in common while we’re there and doing it. We have a desire and need to connect, but not perhaps the willingness or energy to commit to a deeper relationship and all that it entails. I do, however,value the true relationships that I have developed with some of the people I’ve me out here and hope that they continue to live on well beyond the digital stream.
OK. I need two grand. Urgently. No kidding. I need to take care of something by Tuesday 12th January. I am two grand shy. I’ll take ten bucks, twenty or four hundred. I’ve slowly established my networking friends. No rushing to produce big numbers, each one chosen and connected with.
Anyone going to step forward?
My email address is hbs@howardstein.com
I’ll give you my Paypal info
I’ll offer illustration or design work, to make it trade. I’m not asking for a gift.
I bet this is too much to ask of friends.
I’m not a collector, and I came to FB fairly late. I put up a thumbnail of myself and posted 20 pictures of my dogs. I didn’t know how it worked. Immediately, a guy found me, someone who had a crush on me 25 years ago! He was insanely excited to talk. In the mornings, there was always an early post waiting for me. He said we’d be friends forever, and could not believe his good fortune. He the intensely passionate type. I didn’t even get a New Year’s wish. Then, there were the “originals.” They were the ones who shared an office with me as beginners in TV. They checked in, we caught up, we limp along. So now what? Do I want to be here? I had no desire to find high school friends. I could have done that without FB. I would watch a while. The guys came first. I asked why. They loved my picture. A happy smiling girl. Not young, not old. But, no I was not about what color my eyes were or how tall I was. They left. I have no FB male friends. And, no FB girl friends. There is no one on my page whom I could turn to for anything. Anything. I have worked in NY media for 20 years. Still, men want to play. I’m married to a guy who has many FB women friends. He doesn’t hit on them, as far as I know, and he is respectful of them. They are young, beautiful, old, goofy. He treats them well. And, I know if someone asked him for help and he could assist, he would. My guess is that all of his women friends would say, he’s a really decent guy. They would miss him. But, he doesn’t feel that way. I think he might be wrong. I have disappeared for 3 weeks, short time, still no inquiries. I have a friend who posts regularly; you learn quickly people’s rhythm. I have inquired about him. of course, all is well. So, I make a scrapbook everyday. I post pictures I love. Everyone is welcome. The coffee’s
always there. Just not always hot!
Spot on Gayle. Enjoy, expect nothing, don’t stay up waiting.
Howard, angelo l florio, angelo florio how ru and gayle, I never appologized for my terrible comments I made to u and gayle yrs ago I am sorry. And I thank you and gayle for the time effort and work and belief in me I had no idea what was going on, I am doing well and have an 18 year old daughter and a wonderful wife. Although I am at peace I am still pursuing my dreams which still to this day are as strong as they were back then. I did a have a bit of a chapter in a book called “true blue to protect and serve”. A mild spring morn by angelo l florio, st martins press. Like you and gayle to see it I have never stopped struggling with this story writing rewriting I won’t rest until it comes to fruishon. Its embedded in my pores. Howard I didn’t realize what you and gayle were doing for me at the time, I couldn’t It was too close to my heart. But thankyou and hope you can understand I never had the sophistication you both have . Fondly, angelo l florio. PS regarding your need to raise cash, I missed the dead line but put me in for $50.