When you complain about a product or service you’re unsatisfied with, do you make a point to sound different from all the other unhappy customers?
There’s a certain structure and tone that every customer service representative expects to read in a complaint. (Because most of the consumer-corporate conversations that happen online occur in writing, I’ll focus primarily on written complaints here.) Color within the lines and you’ll be treated like any other unhappy customer. You’ll be at the mercy of inane procedures and quickly transform into the punching bag for Customer Service Associate #3762, Jennifer, who is having a bad day. Not interested in that? Learn what Jennifer expects from you and put some effort into surprising her. The results can be spectacular.
How do customer service representatives expect you to complain? Keep reading.
Here’s a complaint I received via email yesterday:
Hey Seth,
I am following you on Twitter and have been for a while but have not gotten a follow back from you. I am going through my account today, doing a little house cleaning. I don’t want to un-follow you so, please, begin following me so we can keep communicating.
Thanks,
(Let’s call him Mike)
I was spittingly incredulous at first. I’d never interacted with Mike on any level before and yet here he was, telling me how to behave? I wondered if the email was some sort of joke sent by a mischievous colleague. It turned out to be a legitimate email.
My first impulse was to write a nasty (nasty–the kind with mean words) reply telling Mike just what I thought of his approach to social networking.
Then I took a moment to reflect on the situation.
I decided to break the email’s message down into its basic parts:
- “Have been for awhile–not gotten a follow back” — Mike remarks on his investment in our relationship. He reminds me that he’s not acting on a whim and feels that he gave me ample time to hold up my end of the bargain.
- “Doing a little house cleaning” — Mike lets me know that he’s serious about unfollowing me. So serious that he conjures up images of dust bunnies fleeing from a hungry vacuum in order to make his point.
- “I don’t want to un-follow you” — Mike makes it clear that he’d prefer not to carry out his threat. He’s only unfollowing because I’m forcing him to.
- “Begin following me so we can keep communicating” — Mike presents me with a single-option road map to success and a reminder of how much I’ll miss if I don’t follow his instructions to the letter.
As I considered reasons why this particular email annoyed me so much, I realized something: I’d encountered this sort of letter before! Many times in fact. The note about my Twitter behavior followed the same format as every other complaint letter I’d ever read. Many of the written complaints customer service professionals deal with on a daily basis can be outlined as follows:
- [Listen to me] – “I’ve been a customer for years” – The customer qualifies the complaint by remarking on a history of patronage.
- [Don't think badly of me] – “I’ve never complained before“ – The customer makes a point to soften the tone. (Most people don’t want to be seen as rabid curmudgeons.) The level of softening varies depending on the personality of the customer. You can usually find at least a few apologetic words in each letter.
- [Here's my side] – “Something went wrong” – This is usually the long part of the letter. It tends to start with a discussion about a problem with a product or service then quickly turns into a narrative about various people and the things they said. Your average customer doesn’t view writing letters as a first option. In my experience, a written letter of complaint only appears after at least three failed conversations have taken place between company representatives and the customer. Most customers regard a failure to connect (hours on hold, lost emails, rescheduled meetings, etc) as a failed conversation.
- [The threat] – “I’m rethinking my decision to be your customer” – The customer states a desire to find satisfaction. As that satisfaction has not been found under the current circumstances, the customer is looking elsewhere. Personal anecdotes are often mentioned at this point. For example, “My friend, Marcie, bought her blender from [competitor] and never had a problem like this.” The word “respect” often comes up at this point. It doesn’t always mean what you’d expect it to.
- [The offer of resolution] – “Please do precisely this and such in order to make me happy” – At the end of the letter, the customer often lays out a plan through which satisfaction can be found without the the provider “losing” the customer’s business. This is the part where expectations sometimes run wild and requests that would have been unimaginable before communication broke down seem like realistic expectations.
While you still have the outline in your mind, lets take another quick look at Mike’s email to see how it compares to the stereotype:
Hey Seth,
I am following you on Twitter and have been for a while but have not gotten a follow back from you. I am going through my account today, doing a little house cleaning. I don’t want to un-follow you so, please, begin following me so we can keep communicating.
Thanks,
“Mike”
Aside from a lack of narrative, which makes sense because Mike and I have never interacted before, Mike’s email follows the expected outline completely. His message is short-sighted, one-sided, demanding, and fails to recognize my side of the story or even ask for my thoughts.
Now that you know how Jennifer expects you to complain, what’s a simple way to surprise her? By turning the outline on its head and expressing your concern in a remarkable fashion.
How to complain with class? Try these:
- Start by seeking a solution — NOBODY expects you to be patient, listen, and take a proactive approach. Use this to your advantage.
- Take notes – From jotting down an action plan to brainstorming for alternate solutions, note-taking is a tried and true method of adding clarity to a situation.
- Avoid threats — It’s common knowledge that you’ll probably go elsewhere if things don’t work out. No need to rub it in anybody’s face.
- Minimize narrative — Present your story with an eye for needed facts only. Using harsh words and a sharp tone serves only to bring more emotions into the situation.
- Proofread your letter/post – Have a smart friend read your complaint over and suggest edits for clarity and tone.
Whenever you make an effort to improve communication, chase solutions instead of people, and listen first, you’ll find that positive results have a way of seeking you out. Sound good? I thought so.
Now, two questions.
- Have you ever written a letter of complaint? If so, did it follow the stereotypical outline? What was the result of your letter?
- What do you think I should say in my reply to the email from Mike?
Thanks for your thoughts. Stay classy!
